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Luke and his wife Trisha blog at IntoxicatedOnLife. How can I break the habit of masturbation and lust? Every time I get overwhelmed or stressed out, my mind clicks off and I end up giving in to the lust, masturbation, and fantasy. I could use your prayers please, and any good devotional. This question highlights our great need to guard our hearts above all else, because we live out of the overflow of our hearts Proverbs The Bible does not specifically condone or condemn masturbation, but it does address a myriad of heart-level issues tied to why people masturbate.
Related: Can you masturbate without lusting? What I loved about this question is how self-aware the questioner is. He has already identified the trigger of stress as a catalyst for his habit to fester. In my experience, the battle with masturbation is a battle of faith.
Behind any habit is a belief system that fuels it. We must replace the old belief system with a new one. We must fight this fight of faith on three fronts:. There are different kinds of triggers: external and internal. An external trigger might be spotting a racy billboard on the way to work or a seeing a plunging neckline. Learning to bounce our eyes away from these sort of triggers can be very helpful.
But it is our internal triggers that are the hardest to run from, because they are…well…in us. Like the gentleman quoted above, the trigger might be stress. We might turn to masturbation as our refuge, our stress-reliever. Stress and anxiety ultimately come from our reactions to stressful situations or circumstances. Why do we react to stressors the way we do? We react with stress because of what we believe about the stressors, the ificance we place on them.
We need to ask ourselves: What do I believe that makes this situation or circumstance or condition stressful for me? Identify what lies you believe about the stressor and then diligently replace those lies with truth. Our trigger might be envy. Again, we must ask ourselves: What do I believe my sex drive is for? Is it to grasp at selfish pleasure, or is to pursue oneness in marriage? Our trigger might be anger at God. Perhaps we are dissatisfied at the way our life has turned out, so we blame God. We turn to masturbation as our own private activity that grasps for a pleasure all our own, a corner of life we claim as wholly ours, a way to rebel.
Again, the battle is one of faith: Why do we believe God owes us anything? Why do we think we ought to get what we desire? Our sex drives will inevitably build up physical tension, but it is our reaction to that tension that matters most. What are we believing that makes masturbation seem like the only way to release the build-up of testosterone?
For single men, God has created built in release mechanisms: either nocturnal emissions or absorption. For married men, God has provided sex as a means of marital intimacy. Do we believe these systems are God-given means of taking care of our bodily drives, or do we believe masturbation is the only way? We must repent of our beliefs about masturbation and praying for a non-sinful release of tension in our members. For many sexual pleasure is the ultimate escape from reality. Like a drug, it provides a fantasy world where we can forget our sorrows or our boring lives.
Instead of using masturbation as an escape from reality, we must learn the habit of escaping into reality, into God Himself. This, again, taps our faith. Related: Porn and the Desire Dilemma. Do we believe God is an all-satisfying Being? Do we believe it is our chief purpose to glorify God and enjoy Him forever?
This was a really helpful article, really easy to understand. The main thing I would add is that a lot of time should be spent in reading the Bible and looking to know more about God. This will wash out the mind and way of thinking. All the images are there to fuel fantasy and masturbation. This has been a struggle for me and I thank God for his mercy and grace for my sin.
Thanks for the tips. This Article was indeed helpful. It feels terrible sinning continually and knowning that He is watching and He still loves us. Sometimes I kinda wish that I could talk to God and hear his voice. It would be so much easier? I really want to stop masturbation am fed up of it.. Guide me please. It really can be difficult to move past this habit. Do you have ability in your life? This has been a very helpful question and very helpful answer. Kicking masturbation is like giving up drugs a drinking this is your choice if it hard then think something.
Good to do should not be hard keep trying never give up. I am so glad i stumbled on to your sight it has given me tools for success thanks keep me in prayers. I have been struggling since childhood, but more in the last 10 yrs with being married. She has never known and I never would want to destroy our marriage in her knowing, God knows and I always disappoint him. I started having inability of carrying through with it and has destroyed my self esteem as a man.
I keep telling Godi need halo and ask forgiveness yet turn around doing it again. I want to do the block on the computer but I have to pay for it and she would ask where this money goes to. If she found out anything it would destroy her trust and love towards me.
If she had any idea I was talking about this on here it would also gestroy it. Please pray and somehow help. I see multiple paths that you can choose from. Continue looking at porn and keep it a secret. Try to stop looking at porn alone but eventually it will fail 3.
Try to stop looking at porn with help. We both know that 3 is the only one that will work. What does true obedience look like for you? Are you as committed to glorifying God with your life as you are finding answers to improving intimacy in your marriage? See, most men believe the idea that we require sex to survive.
Can sex save us? Absolutely not. I know these are hard concepts to live out. I will close by praying for you, Richard. If you decide to choose a life of purity and integrity, I suspect the days will get harder before they get easier. But, God is for you! You are more than a conqueror. How can Luke say masturbation is not condoned or condemned?
Hello, Franco — I think what Luke is saying is that based on Scripture, there are no direct references that condone or condemn the practice. There are principles of holiness and righteousness that would seem to strongly indicate that it is not a path to either of these goals of Christian living. Have you attempted the techniques included in this blog post?
This is a very good start to thinking about how we deal with masturbation. In my own observations, I see two things that cause me to masturbate: the escape and the desire. I literally can make the day go so much faster focusing on sex and women than when I just focus on what I have to do or want to do. However, I think we all need to see that the source of all this is evil. We are contending against evil powers that are literally drawing us away from God and our potential.
Look at David. Saw a naked woman, invited her over for sex, and then had her husband killed. What happened next was him trying to cover it up, him trying to fix it, and him having to live with the consequences. Solomon was born as a result and God gave him his wisdom but again, look what happened to him.
Later in life, he had tons of wives, and many worshiped other gods and he ed them. And he had the wisdom of God!!! You need to look at it that way. This is spiritual more than physical! The Bible talks about satan prowling around looking for who he will devour. We are not alone. We all need to have a plan. A way out. So the question is, what are you going to do when you smell smoke and hear the alarm going off that you want to masturbate? You need a plan. Like for me. Get away from the situation.
Also, there is free software for you computer called K9 protection. Write it down simply for the purposes to create the . Then delete the you used and burn the password. That will help but you still have to have a plan. I realize many of you are dealing with sexless marriages but this is not the answer.
If you have very little intimacy then you can count on not having very much sex. The only way to get it back is for both of you to be honest. You are not alone!!! You must forgive yourself as God continues to forgive you. I challenge all of you to talk about this with your male friends.
Supporting one another and being able to talk to someone who knows how you feel is so important. Now, if your friend sees no issue with it then you need to distance yourself from them. They will only enable you to do it in the future.Help masterbating
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